Dig, Dug, Dang!

I've been staying with Violet's parents over this weekend, so I've been forced to work in pencil only for the time being. Speaking of which I should mention my appreciation for a couple I met on the train to Haymarket. One Colin and Elizabeth, who bought from me a couple of quick portraits I done of them as a souvenir of their trip. I hope the castle wasn't too draughty!

I feel more like an archeologist than a pencil artist at the moment. I've unearthed a number of sketchbooks which have remained dormant on the discarded level of my bookcase in the corner. They hold dates like '2005-06' on them. This is history. Not only history, but my history. The evolution of my ideas and the lines my hands crafted once.

A great many of them are unfinished. And this is where my work begins, and the point of this entry finds itself. I must learn to finish what I begin. This is the lesson I have seeking to learn. I lack the patience to see a task through to its' completion. I came up with a character who is the personification of such a trait. He is the antithesis of all that I am.

If you have ever reached that point in an endeavour, where the interest wanes and your attention begins to split under the pressure, then you know where I'm coming. If you want to deal with this, then you're going where I want to be. So I've been going through these sketchbooks, and adding the lines which need to be there to achieve things like clarity, and lose the ambiguity of diminished focus. To some part of my mind this has become blasphemous. 'What are you doing!? These are snapshots of how you were at that time! Why the hell are you ruining them!' I feel like some heretic in the halls of my own making, scrawling on the walls, 'WRONG!'

I'm not doing it to all the drawings, that would be counter effective. Only those which deserve that something, that drive. This has led me to the creation of a To Do Folder. So much more than a list, it contains the items in question. They're not prioritised yet, they have no order, I jump between them. I'm wondering if this is a way of working which suits me. Project hopping, like a frog on electrified skittles.

So far I have finished 0/16.... getting there!

Something to share with you

Enjoy.

Flying the flags, invisible banners

I thought I would mention as an update that I was working on the header of this blog, the frogboy image that I crafted for my 3rd year end of year presentation. Hopes you all like it. Working on the trasnparency of it so it blends in nicely.. getting there I feel, see how it works out with more tinkering.

More updating to come I feel.

Which day suits?

I've been thinking. Should I pick a day in the week in which I sit down and write a blog post, perhaps twice weekly at most. That way I'll have an appointed date in which I -know- I'm supposed to update this. Then updated outwith that, with important information I feel is neccessary?

So which days do you reckon it should be? Cast your votes now?

Monday / Friday?
Tuesday / Saturday?
Wednesday / Sunday?

Who will keep the dreams?

~

Not many of you read this, this I understand. The world would not make sense if you did. I'm writing this from atop an art paint box slash pop up easel conversion, riddled from lidl for who knows how much. I got it at christmas I think, and I've hardly even used it. Now I have to worry about overheating the paint inside as my laptop struggles through almost tangible perspiration, to continue working.

So in the time between posting before and posting now, I've moved from one room to another, one city to another, one bed to another, and into better company. But since then, I've still been trying to look for paying work.

To keep me otherwise busy I've been modelling possible assets for this coming
4th year. Utilising my maya skills to conjure new and untested works, shown here.



This is Cadeaux, a metaphorical musician and one of the cast of the tragically epic inner workings of my mind. Now when I say, she is a musician, I mean she plays,



A cello.

Both of these models are still in the rough stages, but it is nice to feel like I'm motivating myself into using Maya for personal use. Once you get over the thought processes for creating what you see in your mind, it really can become quite enjoyable. The only thing I could compare this to is driving, even though I can't and never really have.

It would be a novelty to be able to animate Cadeaux playing the Cello, sometime during this summer, all going well.

I've been reading and following a book called the Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. It has an interesting creative endeavour and as I delve farther into, I would probably recommend it to any creator of any kind. I bought the book for Violet for her christmas, and it's taken until now for us both to seriously consider following it. I borrowed a copy from my university library for the moment, so any abertayers can find it there, once I return it!

The morning pages is a great way of kick starting the old kanoodle, and I end up writing down creatively in the latter matters of writing. Morning pages, for reference, are longhand thought streams you just write. Simply just write what comes into your head. Whatever is bothering you, or ailing you. Even just simple matters can be written out. It's a great way for clearing the mind, try it out. 3 pages, each morning.

Also today I watched the latter part of an inspiring film called Dreamkeeper incorporating a number of folklore, along with a moral tale of re-inventing the self. Walking the red road. Taking the journey. Self sacrifice. Telling stories, and the purpose thereof. It's about life. It's worth watching.

I keep getting the itch to paint again...

Value of Time, Worth and Money

It's already going on 2am, and it has certainly been a long day, but I thought I could punch in some blog time all the same. I was already in the car and traversing town before I'd properly woken up. By the moment of me rising from bed, I was already descending the stairs and into the seven seated courier to my latest 'job'. I've in honesty been putting it off, for one because of the weather and two to recover from something. Hands felt stiff and sore for a bit, but that's eased off now.

In the interim period however, I fired up maya and I've been modelled a test mesh for a character Cadeaux, whom will be one of the protagonists in future DoaM animations. One of the few female characters to feature so far! Modelling takes on a different nature when things run smoothly and things seem to work out, but I know I'm soon going to leave my comfort zone of familiar polygonal topology and I'll have to experiment with Maya's hair system. Feeling it'll be worthwhile though.

I'll post up test renders soon.

I've been thinking more on the point of earning money. Time as we know is said to equate metaphorically to money. This as Lakoff states is relected in our culture's system of paying employees by the hour. By this very pattern we can emerge at the comclusion that time is inherently valuable. However, everyone has time, not everyone has money. So the two 'matters' aren't an automatic translation, sadly. However if we invest our time, it may prove beneficial in finding a job...

I'm feeling these odd jobs are a method of building character and I'm learning alot about the way I think and how it applies to more areas than just my art. I have a tendency to reach the end of something, a task, a creation or a period of time and I'm reluctant always to finish whatever that might be in context. It always leaves me less than 'what could have been.' I'm yet to figure out, why this is, and why it remains ever prevalent in all that I do.

I could feel my drive depleting as I got into the latter stages of weeding today. I kept purposefully missing spotted weeds thinking, ah well she's not going to mind one or two remaining. It got to the point where I reached a plateau of expectation. What I thought was expected of me, and what I expected the reactions of my efforts to be. As it were, I was paid before I had finished and this I felt became double edged. I knew I could walk away at any point thereafter (within reason) but I felt then obligated to earn the money given. I tried to guage how much that amount of money would cover in what actions I then undertook.

More later I guess, I want to go read the Artist's Way.~

Working by Day, 'Real' Work by Night

So my life is as thus. Waking to the sound of my father arranging and seemingly re-arranging things around 'my' room, all the while huffing and sighing in a regular pattern regardless of what it is he is doing. Summoned over the phone by my mother to agree to paid work she's managed to organise for me, outwith my knowledge. So far it's been painting her fence, with a rather nifty power spray thing, and a whole lot of gardening re-discovering beneath a jungle of weeds and grass. Today is the back garden of the same allotted owner, and I'm timidly looking forward to this job ending. And then it's on to washing cars!

These fill my daylight hours. By night, I'm designing band logos and putting in some solid hours into playing the Xbox 360 while I have the chance. So far my playlist includes Spiderman 3, GTA IV and Lost Oddyssey. Which are fun, intriguing and highly beautiful yet lacking in real engagement yet, respectfully.

This is really making me consider the nature of the career I'm wandering into. Where my true interests at the moment are being reserved for later hours, and where my usual skillset isn't finding me the money I require. I suppose finding a job is easier if you're not specifically offering a particular service and are willing to work under the title of Lackey. I guess it's not half bad to be inexperienced and be learning new skills -while- you're being paid to do so. I know how to more effectively use a garden fork to better effect on soil and weeds, much to the protest of my palms. I really should have considering bringing old clothes, but who could have foreseen my mother's dexterity in finding work like that?

What is my time really worth either way? What is the value of time itself? It's rather dependant upon the one seeking your time, in context time is variable.

So it is on to battle dogs and rabbits in a bid to free a garden path from the onslaught of rabid dandelion spores! Yarrghh! Armed with a spade, and curved knife, gardening gauntlets and a fortitude to outlast weed kind. Suffer the slings and stench of the uprooted tyranny and reclaim the peace of a well kept garden, all to appease the neighbouring citizens disgust, from over yonder fences.



Oh and here is the logo I'm currently attempting to make legible, if any of you can read this lemme know what you think it is meant to say... I'm cautious about the ambigram-ality of it, and whether effective clarity is suffering. While the design itself looks quite cool, I can't tell if it is delivering the right message at the moment. However this is design 1 of hopefully many.

Also Tidan, got any more work on your minotaur yet!? Love to see it. :P

Boxes upon boxes, in the foritifed junk

I am sitting amid chaos, of the bric-a-brac kind. The floor barely visible, let along treadable to traverse my escape. This is the nature of a world of moving, and packing and taking one world into the next. All of these belongings, belong elsewhere to another one, and I haven't a clue how to make head nor tail of sense of it all.

It's also the reason for the diverted flow of energies and the lack of posting. I'm still doodling when given the chance, but otherwise I'm attempting to remain useful in a 'move this from here to there' kind of way. If only I were telekinetic...

~

I've been getting the sensations in the back of my mind to begin writing again. Maybe it's a summer thing, who knows but it's creeping back. I'd really like to know where to begin but I think that's like trying to figure out which shadow begins the darkness. Awfully pleasant metaphor there... Ah, metaphor. Of course. I plan on reading books about metaphor in my whiling away time down in Kelso, amongst the avid gaming and catching up with relatives of course. Both written or co-written by G. Lakoff, I'm hoping to further my understanding of the nature of metaphor, so that I can better write about it and make it the axis upon which my future works can spin.

There needs to be more 'where's' and 'what's' and 'when's' in the tale of metaphor. Everything begins with a dream though, where the Hatted Fool plummets in a spiral, ever quickening in his descent, racing toward... something. Perhaps it is an epiphany? Some moment of clarity and boom, suddenly there are feet. Hands. A train carriage. Discovery. Whispers. Strangers. Fear. 'Gators. Emptiness. Patiences. Fishing. A door. Bridges. And then.... a void of unknown, yet to be conceived possible potentiality...

Best get started!